Posts Tagged ‘dating’
To be in loved with a girl and start a relationship is a wonderful thing. Long term relationships are usually based on love, trust and honesty. Even if honesty is very important in a relationship, sometimes may be hurtful. There are some things that can’t be told to the partner because it may hurt her, or make her change the opinion about you. For example, some bad things you’ve done in the past, a truth about her that will make her feel bad if you tell her, and so on.
Even if you love her very much and you are getting pretty close, these things that can affect your relationship should be kept in secret. Sometimes you can best show her your love by keeping your mouth shout. So, before you start to be too confident and directly with her, you should take a look at these things that may destroy your relationship.
Never tell her she is getting fat
Even if this is true, you can’t tell her this. It will make her feel very bad, and will think that you don’t like her anymore. Think about how she would feel if you go there and say: ” honey, you could stand to lose a little weight ”. Let her decide when is the time to lose weight because she will do it without you hurting her. In most of the cases when a man told her girlfriend that she got fat, he gets dumped.
Don’t tell her how your mother would have done things
I know that for men their mothers always represent a model in life, but we have to admit that all the families are different. So, we have been raised by different kinds of parents and in different ways of life. Everyone is taught to do things in their ways and that’s why you can’t ask your girlfriend to do things or to live like your mother. A woman can have her views and opinions, and all you can do about this is to tell her stories about how you were raised and how things have been done in your family. You should adapt at this new way of life, without comparing her with your mom.
Don’t tell her that you like to visit your mom too often
Maybe in that moment you love your mother more that her, but you don’t have to show it. She may think that she is competing with your mom, or worst, that you are depending on mommy. It is not at all in your favor.
Don’t criticize her when she is trying to do her best
This is the worst thing you can do. If she sees that she is trying hard to do the things fine and you begin criticize her, she would feel disappointed that you don’t know to appreciate her for the fact that she is trying her best. So you should get over it, and offer you to help her in doing that job. Maybe next time she’ll be doing better.
Never tell her if your family doesn’t like her
Even if your family dislike her, it is better to not tell her because she will get angry and insecure. This will create future problems and tension between her and your family. All you can do is to let your family know that she is the one you have chosen and they have to respect your decision. Try to make them change their minds about her.
Don’t remind her about your ex in a special moment
Never ever compare your dating nights or things you do together with the ones you have done with your ex. It might happen to go with her in places where you have been with the other, but don’t remind her that. It is a hurtful thing for her to see that you are still thinking about the other.
Also, never compare her to your ex in bed. She will feel bad to find out that the other was better than she in bed. No woman likes to be compared to another, in any aspect.
Don’t recognize if you have done bad things in your past
If she doesn’t find out already, you better keep your mouth shout; it is in your favor. If you tell her that you have cheated your past girlfriends, for example, she will have a totally bad opinion about you, and also fell disappointed. So these things you shouldn’t divulge.
Never tell her that a football game is more important for you than her
Even if is an important game, don’t tell her to let you alone in that moment because you are busy and don’t have time for her. You better smile and pretend that you are listening to her too, and try to catch the key words. She might ask you what she was talking to you to test you.
Don’t tell her that you hate her friends
Because she knows her friends for a long time that she knows you, it is not a good idea to tell her that she doesn’t like her friends, or to say something bad about them. She may get angry about this, so you better pretend that you like them and everything is ok.
Don’t ask her to relax when she is very angry
When she is very upset, scared, or very angry the worst thing you can do is to ask her to relax. This will make her angrier because she will think that you don’t take her in serious. If you upset her by making some bad things, if you just say her to relax she will understand that you are denying that there is a reason to be upset.
Don’t tell her that you are insecure
In a relationship or dating woman is looking after a strong and confident man. So if you are insecure, or you are jealous on her because, for example, she has a better salary than yours, you have to keep this aspect just for yourself. She doesn’t have to know it if you want that things between you to go well.
Don’t declare your love during a fight
The words ‘‘I love you ‘‘mean a lot for a woman that’s why it should be said at the right moment. But most of guys say this during they have a fight with their partner, in the worst moment ever. When you are mistaking in front of her, and let’s say that you feel guilty, you want her to forgive you, so you declare your love for her. It is a wrong choice. She doesn’t believe a word in what you say because she considers that if you really loved her you wouldn’t upset her. You may say you love her but only after your fight is over.
Do not tell her that you like her girlfriend
Maybe one of her girlfriends is very beautiful and you would like to meet her first, but your actual partner shouldn’t find this. If you say her that her best friends looks very good, she will feel hurt, angry and will never trust you around her friends. So keep it secret and make sure to not be obvious from your attitude that you like staring at her girlfriend sometimes.
If you want to have a long and strong relationship you shouldn’t permit that some things you may say to destroy it. Don’t be completely honest about the things which should not be told.
“How do you know when you’ve met the right one?”
Almost everyone asks this question at some point in their lives; unfortunately, there are not too many who get a concrete answer. But if you’re reading this article, then you’re one of the lucky few.
Interestingly, the criteria for choosing a spouse can be reduced to just four key characteristics. If you can find somebody with all four then it’s highly likely that you’ve found your life partner.
1) What is This Person’s Core Values?
Before you decide to marry someone, make sure that they are fully committed to some kind of objective moral and ethical standard. Whether we realize it or not, everyone has some kind of core value that is central to their personality. And when push comes to shove, that value is going to be the most important thing in the world to that person.
For example: Jerry’s core value is adventure. When Jerry starts to date Diana, he happens to be volunteering at the local Emergency Room. He goes there every night, holds people’s hands, calms them down. And Diana is thinking to herself that Jerry must have a heart of gold if this is how he’s spending his spare time. Now, Jerry might really have a heart of gold. But he’s volunteering because of his love for adventure. The ER is filled with action, it’s exciting. So right now, Jerry’s adventurousness happens to be expressing itself in a kind way. But that could change. Jerry might stop volunteering, and start trying other adventures that Diana may find unpleasant, dangerous, or even unethical.
However, if Jerry’s core value is a commitment to goodness and caring, then everything he does will rotate around that, including his marriage. And Diana will be a very lucky woman if she marries him.
So how do you get to know the true Jerry? Surprisingly, it’s not that difficult. No matter what a person’s core value is, you will see him or her sacrificing for it on a daily basis. If Jerry’s core value is adventure, then he might risk an accident in order to speed through an intersection or arrive late at work because he followed a police chase. If Diana follows him carefully, she’ll see that he places adventure above other important things on his list of priorities. But if Jerry’s core value is goodness, then Diana will see him give up on certain things in order to be kind. If the waiter mixes up his order, he’ll say thank you and eat the dish anyway. He’ll let the other guy cross the intersection first, or he might be late to work because he drove a little old lady home with her groceries. If Diana follows him carefully, then she’ll see him let go of some of his own desires in order to take care of other people.
So look for someone who is committed at the core to a higher set of values that you can appreciate.
2) Does This Person Treat Others Well?
Number two is obvious: You want to marry someone who is going to take care of you and treat you well. How to figure it out? Simple. Spend time with this person, and pay attention to how they treat others whom they don’t necessarily care about because they’re not trying to charm them. Do they thank the attendant who pumped gas for them? Are they courteous to people at checkout counters? Do they curse out people who don’t deliver on time, like telephone operators or overworked waitresses? Do they tend to drive aggressively, as if there’s no one else on the road?
Ask yourself questions like these and take note of the answers – because they reflect characteristics that will come out down the line. Most people don’t guard themselves so carefully that they’ll hide how they treat others. So watch them, and you’ll know how they’re going to treat you after you’re married.
3) Do We Communicate Well With Each Other?
In other words, make sure that you understand each other. This may seem obvious, but it’s not.
Sometimes you can see a couple in a fight and they argue for an hour, two hours, maybe even overnight. And then, at the end of round 16, it turns out that the whole thing was just a misunderstanding: “Oh, I thought you meant that…That’s not what you meant? Oh, then we agree.”
Although on an occasional basis this can happen to anyone, if it’s happening constantly then it’s not a good sign because that may not change. If you’re constantly misunderstanding each other, then you might want to put this relationship on hold for a while.
4) Are We Physically Attracted to Each Other?
Physical attraction is an essential part of marriage. You cannot marry someone if you aren’t physically attracted to them. And while men arrive at this conclusion somewhat quickly, women should give themselves some more time. Very often, a woman may not feel attracted to a man initially, but after she gets to know him she finds him much more attractive than before.
A word of caution: Although physical attraction is essential, you can’t base a marriage on physicality. Whatever is going on physically is meant to be an expression of something deep that is happening on the emotional and spiritual level. The rule is – make sure that physical attraction is there, but don’t get swept away by it. The other three characteristics are just as important, if not more so.
So there you have it. The next time you date someone, put what you’ve learned here into practice. It’ll save you a lot of time and heartache, and you might find yourself walking down the aisle faster than you think.
You have met an interesting woman online. You two had a great time chatting online and she decided to give you her phone number. Now you have to make her want to see you face to face, and the phone is your only tool.
The first telephone call is the most important one. Sure you have her number, but nothing has been won yet.
1. Before you call you should have prepared a list of several topics to talk about.
Hopefully your email exchange has provided you with some information to follow up on. Study her profile to think of other topics to talk about. Prepare open ended questions. Start talking about a subject, and give her a chance to speak as well.
2. DON’T: ask her questions about other guys she’s seeing, suspiciously interrogate her about how she spends her time, and angrily reprimand her
for flaking on you.
How she spends her time is her business.
A lot of men sabotage their chances with a woman by don’t giving her enough credit and respect.
You know there’s trouble if you’re doing all the talking and her replies are short or non-existent. If so it either means you haven’t hit on the right topic to talk about, or, more likely, she simply isn’t interested. Also, if she ends the
conversation early or “has to go”, leave it up to her to call you again, if she wants to. Usually, she won’t.
So, when talking to a woman on the phone DON’T worry about impressing her. Have fun. Enjoy the conversation. Amuse yourself.
3. At first phone conversation is better to stay away of complimenting her.
I think giving women compliments can be very powerful. But when you
give a woman compliments within the context of trying to win her over, you become a wuss.
Usually women are curious why the men they are talking to online decided to pick them instead of other thousandths of profiles. Most of them will ask you about these “reasons” and by doing this are giving you the opportunity to make her compliments. So, wait the moment. 
If the conversation flow easily, effortlessly, if you find her fairly responsive and you can keep up the conversation for at least a half hour you can ask her out. Her answer seam to be: “YES”.
