Archive for December, 2010
Confessions of a Matchmaker is a weekly half-hour show that airs on A&E. It follows matchmaker Patti Novak as she tries to match couples in Buffalo, New York. Below you will find some dating tips that can be learned from Episode 5, Paul & Amy.
Episode 5 (Paul & Amy) – Dating Tips:
– Avoid being “motherly” or “fatherly”. Your date is looking for a potential boyfriend or girlfriend. They already have a mom and dad.
– If you once felt sexy and confident, but don’t anymore, then do everything you can to get it back (i.e. change your look, lose weight, change your attitude, etc.). If you feel good about yourself, it will show. So change your lifestyle so that you once again feel good about yourself.
– Being egotistical, cocky, or talking about yourself too much on a date is a huge turnoff.
– LISTEN on your date (and that doesn’t mean listening to yourself speak).
– Learn table manners before you go on a date.
– If you live with your parents, don’t talk about it on your date!
– Never talk about your ex on a first date.
– “You’ve got to love yourself to be loved.”
– Be humble.
– If you feel your date is asking all the questions, learn to switch the focus back to them, by asking them questions about things that interest them.
Living with your parents when you are old enough to marry is a major turnoff to potential dates. It’s probably information you shouldn’t volunteer – particularly on a first date! It instantly puts up red flags (what’s wrong with him/her that he/she still lives with mommy and daddy?).
I’ve noticed that in several episodes, people make the mistake of talking about past relationships while on a date. Some volunteer, but others are asked. This is a topic to avoid at all costs. If you are asked about your ex, simply say “that’s a topic for another time” or “let’s instead talk about…” (change the subject – preferably to something you know your date is interested in). You can also take the direct and honest approach: “I never talk about past relationships on a first date”.
Confessions of a Matchmaker is a matchmaking and advice show airing weekly on A&E. It’s a show that offers dating tips and dating advice to singles through the eyes of matchmaker Patti Novak. Below are dating tips that can be learned from Episode 6, Lynn and Matthew.
Episode 6 (Lynn & Matthew) – Dating Tips:
– Don’t lie about your age.
– Don’t come on too strong on your first date. It will scare your date away.
– Don’t treat your date like he/she is at a job interview.
– Be genuinely interested in learning about your date.
– On a first date, don’t tell someone you live with your mom and dad!
– Don’t limit yourself by creating a list of standards for dating (i.e. person must have black hair, blue eyes, and be at least 6? tall).
I was really disappointed with Patti in this episode. The reason why is because Matthew is a minister and Patti tried matching him with someone who wasn’t very religious. In his interview, he clearly told Patti that he was a minister and his beliefs take precedence over everything else.
In matchmaking there are some boundaries that need to be followed. If a person doesn’t believe in God and is a die-hard atheist, you don’t try to match them with someone who puts God first in their life and vice-versa. To make the minister go out on a date with a woman who is not very religious probably brought some amount of embarrassment to this minister from his congregation. Obviously, if a person is a minister then his/her foundation is built around religion and God. Patti ignored this fact.
If a person is a vegetarian and makes it clear that he/she does not want to be matched with someone who eats meat, then you don’t match that person up with a meat eater! This is why online dating services provide various ways of you to determine matches – so that your core beliefs aren’t compromised in the search for love.
What was interesting about this episode is that what you think you want may not be what’s right for you. In this episode, Lynn wanted a man with blue eyes, at least 6’2, and 23 years old (even though she was 30+). The date didn’t go well. When Patti matched her up with a guy who had brown eyes, was 5’8 and 42 years old, the two hit it off. The point is that if you’re not having success then change things up by eliminated your “must be” list and trying out new adventures.
Every week on A&E, Patti Novak dispenses dating advice to singles through her reality series Confessions of a Matchmaker. Below are dating tips that can be learned from Episode 7, Janet and Derek.
Episode 7 (Janet & Derek) – Dating Tips:
– Learn to be Self-Confident. You have to assert yourself.
– Don’t create a “wall of excuses” that keeps you from dating and dating success.
– It’s important to mentally be ready for love before you begin searching for love.
– If you don’t feel sexy or good looking, then get a makeover! Build your confidence before your date.
– To be good at dating, you sometimes have to take risks that put you outside of your comfort zone (like being self-confident).
– In order to let others in, you must first let your guard down.
One of the biggest inhibitors to successful dating is having a lack of confidence. If you are a person who lacks confidence, it’s important to first build that back up. I’d recommend the following books:
The Confidence Plan: How to Build a Stronger You
Feel the Fear . . . and Do It Anyway
The Ultimate Secrets of Total Self-Confidence